stephanie learns to sew

PROJECT NO.1: unfinished business

in the fall of 2007, echo allred and i were new moms watching massive amounts of project runway and having some craft nites to try and live the dream. we caught wind of these really cool, comfortable, and stay-put headbands and just had to make them ourselves! so we each got some materials and met up one night and made patterns and traced and pinned.... and that is where it ended for me.

she sewed hers like the next day or something and now has a successful business selling her lovely creations on etsy (jaceyecho), to all of us who love these things, and at local craft fairs (contact her on etsy or through her blog for all your headband needs!).

mine.... well... mine was unfinished with all my other might-have-been projects in my sewing drawer.

UNTIL YESTERDAY THAT IS! i got the headband stuff out and finished her up with the assistance of my trusty betty jeanne the machine. it was a good first project, not too big but still got good practice in.

since our computer that we edit photos on is getting a tune up, please excuse the phone photos, but here she is:


hooray!

better to just be

dont force an identity or passion
the mind is a blur
cotton, wool, twirl
grey and thin
worn outside and in

content am i
to spin this lullaby
build that tower there
support you and share

girls pretending to be their mothers
when age doesnt match occupation

and

i'm more of a shadow
secure in my whim
fertile yet trim
hold onto my son
trade vogue for fun

not much of a sewer or crafter
or a homemaking whiz
not too concerned with whole wheat or canning just yet
children, music, art, and novels would be my best bet

but we all really do what we all do best

it's just what we like

there will be no test

isn't it lovely that no one's the same?

if you like movies better than cooking or yoga better than crafting there's really no shame.

i am what i am and not what i try to be
tomorrow could change
but today will Be.

no set requirements
bright, glowing love
concern and hope for you
trust up above
careful, thoughtful
hold on tight
hug them close
walk in the light.

cabin fever?

bored of the same old books, tv shows, and toys?
go here for some great ideas (and some that, well let's face it, none of us will ever do) if the frigid january weather is making you and your kids feel trapped and crazy. i know that we have to get out and be active a lot or ambrose turns into a beast... and so does his out-of-patience mom.

even here in hawaii it hasnt exactly been great beach/outdoors weather so these tips came at just the right time. hope you enjoy!

i've also been planning what i'm going to get ambrose for his second birthday in march and this is what he's getting (shhh, dont tell him!):

book worm lizzie

i dont know if you notice sidebars, but if you do you may have noticed that mine (to your right over there) has a list of the books i have been reading. i really love to read. i have said it on here before, but i feel like there is this limitless amount of books all piled up in my head in an unorganized, but well-meaning 'to-read' list and i want to read them all- RIGHT NOW! it's as if i believe there will be some test at the end of my life and if i skipped Anna Karenina then i fail or something (yes, that one is on the 'to-read' list as well)... or maybe it's the english major in me that feels like a fraud when people say, "well, in The Catcher in the Rye...etc. etc." and i have to admit that i have never actually gotten around to reading that one yet... although i fully intend to!

so, one day i sat down and made an actual list, which turned into a couple of lists, which got overwhelming, but mostly it's just fun to plan... where am i going will all this?

i want to have a good record of all the good books that i want to read, that you may want to read and that others recommend reading all in one place: my blog. this way anyone who is interested (but selfishly, i feel excited about at least having it for me if no one else cares!) can have a place to come back to if they are looking for a good book to read. just search by "book worm" since i will always label each list as such. i havent come up with my all-time favorites yet, but my most current reads will always be found to your right.

and without further ado- we are starting this out right with a girl i really truly look up to:

Lizzie Heiselt: wife to micah, mother to simon, met her and micah at byuh (he was web/graphic designing for PCC), recently got her masters from NYU, lives in brooklyn, has run a marathon and several other enviable races, cooks like you wouldnt believe and writes like i wish i could... here is a list she compiled after studying at NYU... i'll let her take over from here. she put this on her blog the same day i decided to do this whole book worm thing - kindred spirits? i think so!

Reading List

I tried to write down all the books and authors that my professors told me would be good to read to help develop my writing and just for the sheer joy of reading compelling stories and solid writing. Here's a good sized list of them (in no particular order and with links), in case any of you are interested in that sort of thing. I personally can't vouch for many of them; I put them here as much for my own reference as for anybody else's. If you are interested in more, I can make another list of some of the things we actually read in class (there are a few books at the bottom, but mostly we read articles and stories and chapters of books).

Joan Didion
Adrian Nicole LeBlanc
Gay Talese
V.S. Naipaul
Hemingway's Short Stories
Eudora Welty
Anton Chekov
Anne Tyler
Huckleberry Finn
The Scarlet Letter
Leaves of Grass
Collected Works of Shakespeare
Nathanael West Miss Lonelyhearts
Elmore Leonard When the Women Come Out to Dance
Virginia Wolff A Room of Ones Own
Charles Dickens A December Vision (his social journalism)
E.M. Forester Aspects of the Novel
Percy Lubbock The Craft of Fiction
Prefaces (at least) to Henry James's novels
Frances Fitzgerald Cities on a Hill
James Agee Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
Thornton Wilder The Bridge of San Luis Rey
John Hersey Into the Valley
Aristotle's Poetics
Andrew Radford English Syntax
Wayne Booth The Rhetoric of Fiction
James B. Stewart Follow the Story

Other books I read for school and enjoyed enough to share with you:
Jason DeParle American Dream: Three Women, Ten Kids, and a Nation's Drive to End Welfare
Janet Malcolm The Journalist and the Murderer
Joseph Mitchell (anything by Mitchell is great) Up in the Old Hotel
Norman Sims The Literary Journalists
William Finnegan Cold New World: Growing Up in a Harder Country
John Hersey Hiroshima

for this complete list with links- go to her original posting of this awesome list!

gotta sec? vote for my man!

Upstanding Youth's new CD, A Sense of Urgency, is up for a Hawaii Music Award. We would love to have your vote. Please visit the HMA website and vote for them in the "Ska" category. They have a 3 for 3 record with the Hawaii Music Awards, so lets go for number 4!!

if you do it and they win, i promise to post a picture of the little trophy they got their first year... yes, that would be the one that was printed up as "Understanding Youth"- haha! awesome.

stephanie learns to sew

she no longer intimidates me.

my machine, who i have appropriately named betty jeanne (my mama's name), is no longer a mysterious wonder. i had a two and a half hour class at the bernina store and i think it wont be long before i actually attempt to make something. bernina is seriously great, free orientation class and handbook and all kinds of other tricks that just come with the machine. four out of the six of us there had the really fancy 700-something model (mine is a 220 and i still think it's magical).

the teacher would show me and another lady how to do something and then show the fancy 700 model ladies which button on their machine does it for them. at one point i exclaimed, "oh brother! next you guys are going to learn where the 'make dress' button is!" seriously, there are some crazy touch-screen machines out there. :)

but it's kind of like when thomas had a nikon d40 and had to manually learn how to adjust things- he learned a ton about photography! i felt like i was actually learning to sew. i can make a great looking button hole with a trick or two on my 220 and their machines can make it for them... i dont know, i felt kinda legit... like, "that's nice ladies... you can kick back and let your machine tacky up a quilt while i actually sew something on mine." :)

well, that's about the extent of my puffed up ego when it comes to sewing... next step, actually making something. check back someday for that... not too soon mind you. after all, me and betty jeanne (the machine) have just become acquainted, it takes a while to become BFF.

and what did the boys do while i was embarking on my journey to becoming the next great american designer on project runway... i mean, learning to sew?

they were at a nearby beach park watching the birds, getting their feet wet and sandy, running around, eating snacks, watching a bunch of newly weds take wedding photos and one couple actually get married with no one but a priest and photographer (and thomas and ambrose) around to witness...etc. etc.

it was a great day for all of us.

we've been having some family adventures

and he has to find something to do to pass the time in the car.

hide and seek

get out and play with your babies.

that's all i had in mind

it's nice to check in with everyone and be connected with you all.

i think we are off on a photo adventure in a little bit here. dont worry (you werent really worried though were you? were you??)- you'll be involved shortly... stay tuned!

here, listen to one of the best radiohead songs of all time. turn it up real loud and let that deep, massive guitar pulse through your veins. seriously, loud, LOUD! loud is always best.

you are what you eat, i like it (right now i'm a piece of pie)

i dont know if i always loved produce so much or if it just happened gradually as i got older, but i love it. im no health expert by any means and i eat my fair share of junk and i really enjoy that too, but the good news is that i also absolutely love fruit, vegetables, tofu, fish...etc... moderation in all things, right? so, anyway, my friend rachel sent out something enjoyable today and i thought i would share since it made me feel extra fruity and more like a vegetable.... what? hmmmm..... anyway, hopefully you love it too.

(this is just a bad quality photo taken by my phone of a sample of my weekly share in this co-op i am a part of. i am so grateful to be a part of this awesome co-op- this is only a portion of what we normally get for so cheap and everything is always big and beautiful and tasty and i dont have to take an impatient toddler to the grocery store, beautiful!)

YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT

“We’ve all heard we are what we eat, but did you know that studies
show that every whole food we eat has a pattern that resembles a body
organ or physiological function and gives us a heads up on what
benefits that food might provide us? Here are a few examples:

“A sliced Carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and
radiating lines look just like the human eye...and science shows that
carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.

“A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart is red and has four
chambers. All of the research shows tomatoes are indeed pure heart and
blood food.

“Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape
looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows that
grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.

“A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere,
upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds are
on the nut just like the neo-cortex. We now know that walnuts help
develop over 3 dozen neuron-transmitters for brain function.

“Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes,
they look exactly like the human kidneys.

“Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and more look just like bones. These foods
specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these
foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet the
body pulls it from the bones, making them weak. These foods replenish
the skeletal needs of the body.

“Eggplant, Avocados and Pears target the health and function of the
womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs.
Today's research shows that when a woman eats 1 avocado a week, it
balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight and prevents cervical
cancers. And how profound is this? ... It takes exactly 9 months to
grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000
photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these
foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).

“Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the
glycemic index of diabetics.

“Onions look like body cells. Today's research shows that onions help
clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce
tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes.”

(Source attributed to David Bjerklie, of TIME Magazine)

rough morning

thomas, if you are reading this, a-bomb is eating a sandwich and watching the dog movie and seems to be much happier... i think we'll be fine.

have a good day y'all.

"He is going to be counting on the American people to come together," Colin Powell, the former military leader and secretary of state, said in an appearance on MSNBC on Tuesday morning. "We all have to do something to help the country move forward under the leadership of this new president." (New York Times)

this morning, when i heard our new president say that many people cut back their hours so more of their fellow employees could keep their jobs i felt proud instead of sad for thomas and our family. that is what we are doing right now, and we will continue to do what we need to to help our country get back on it's feet.

and he's off!

today is no holiday for thomas robertson. he needed to head out and track down some new clients who may really need his help right about now. so we are saving our monday holiday for next week and have some serious family fun planned in honolulu.

i can tell it's monday because this always happens: we have a lovely weekend and thomas is such a hands-on dad and team player in our relationship that when the weekend is over (sort of like when midnight strikes for cinderella and the spell is broken) and it's back to regular life, i always have a little moment of worry... like, "WAIT! you're leaving now? it's up to ME and only me to be in charge?? are ya sure???"

of course me and the toddler end up have a grand old time and we're fine, but the arrival of monday morning really makes me appreciate any time spent with my eternal mate: t-rob. :)

so, me and bubba headed straight out to the beach this morning and now we're back to eat dino shaped chicken nuggets... if we're gonna have a monday we may as well have a really great monday.

bath time ritual

one day i was in the shower and i looked down and saw two ducks kissing:

that night at bath time i decided to pay attention and sure enough, miss peach and the ducks are oh-so carefully placed in this exact configuration by a certain toddler we all know.

first he has the ducks kiss... once or twice. i've never thought of myself as homophobic, but for some reason i heard myself assuring thomas that the one with the cape is a girl. haha! then he gingerly sets them down like so. next miss peach is kissed by him and placed lovingly next to her duck friends to chaperon i suppose.

this has been repeated every night for the last week.

he is a very affectionate child.

the three of us had a nap today

me, ambrose, and his baby brother in between.
so far we are all getting along beautifully.

20 weeks today

half way through my pregnancy and feeling good.

i really like: trying my best even when i'm tired or it's hard

a shift is happening.

my baby boy is a toddler and is pretending he is two or something. it is a little tiring and i feel like i have a choice to make.

sometimes i want to be lazy and just let things be, but i know i am not doing him any favors. i need to get up, and be hands on. this can be exhausting, but i need to do it.

so, when i get moments like i got this morning i savor them.

me and ambrose sitting on the couch, him on my lap, his usually busy little toddler legs in my hands and his sweet head uncharacteristically relaxed and resting on on me too. we're watching 101 dalmatians for the umpteenth time and i really dont mind, i like this one. we're bobbing along to the music and snuggling up a little more when that scary cruella deville is on the screen. he sighs and says, "my mama" and nuzzles in and i am enjoying it.

later today he'll get a time out for trying to flush a whole roll of toilet paper down the toilet and i'll think it's funny, but i'll have to be firm and lead him gently but uncompromisingly to his room until he can settle down and come out on his own.


this is hard for me, but i know i need to do it if i want him to grow into the person i know he was intended to be and he is so smart that he is forgiving and when he's calmed down we'll get out the crayons to draw a picture for daddy, and chomp on apple slices, and curl up to read a good story and he will be a little wiser for it and have learned something.

that's my hope for him anyway. it's not easy being a toddler or the mom of a toddler sometimes, but it is pretty sweet and precious too.

i really like: putting embarrassing songs on my iPod

my iPod was found recently... never stolen, just put somewhere odd that i promise i looked in fifty times... never believe me again when i draw such accusatory conclusions. :) but dont you love it when you are in someones car and a really embarrassing song comes up on their iPod mix and they fumble around to change it or make up an elaborate story to explain why they have it on there? this has not only personally happened to me, but i have been in the car with too many friends to count and this very thing has happened. i love it! let's just embrace it people - if you like it there must be a reason and if there is no reason that's even better.

my car is going to be ok. i get her back in a day or two and the warranty covers everything (sigh of relief).

and i forced myself to think of like six boy names that i could be excited about when naming this second baby and told thomas to choose from those... he hasnt gotten back to me, but it's a start.

and diana, i know! i need to post a picture of my pregnant self... i just dont have one. i'll take one this weekend and that's a promise! (if you want to go to echo's blog, i look the same, just picture my head on her body to get the full effect.)

and ambrose got a couple time outs today, but he also got to play with a lot of friends, said like three new words, and ate dino shaped chicken nuggets so the whole day wasnt a total wash.

and i might finally do a little work this week (from home, of course, as always) which i am actually happy about since our family is having sort of a lean month with the new job adjustments.

oh yeah, melissa c., that most certainly is a sports bra in those pictures (how tacky!!)

and i may or may not have marched my big pregnant bum outside in it with some shorts to the beach right after those photos were taken... all over in my neighborhood and down to the beach.... pretending it was a swim suit of course, but i mean, i DO live in hauula.... no one blinked an eye. they probably thought it was classy. :)

i really like: making lemonade out of my lemon (she's not a lemon, she's just having a little fit)

my sassy little car is having a tantrum of sorts right now and the dealership cant get to her until wednesday- this means i am car-less for probably the whole week.

i know i spent almost a year in this helpless state before (a mother without a car is usually a frustrated mother indeed)... but i find myself wondering what one without a car does all day and how does one without a car get anything done?

what we used to do when we had no car:

-go for more walks
-walk down the street to the beach, spend all day there
-pad around home some more, eat home cooked lunches, and get creative
-spend less money
-rely on thomas to get run-around errands done for us when he can during the day






so, to re-cap, after this week we might be:

-healthier
-more tan
-more creative and eating healthier
-have the money in the bank that we would have otherwise spent on gas and expenses
-only have what we really need instead of what we decided to get while we were out and bored since we don't want to bug thomas too much

awesome.

i wouldn't want this to be the permanent state of things since i think all moms need a way to get around and get things done, but i am choosing to think of this week as a mini-vacation from the everyday hustle.

well, see you later, we're off to the beach! (yes, those are the shoes he is insisting on wearing to the beach...)

i really like: getting that "ah ha!" moment

sometimes being a mom is like being nancy drew, or any of her female counterparts. you have to put all the clues together.

clues:
1. ambrose is being really really whiny and annoying (like, more than usual that is)...hmmmmmm......
2. ambrose isn't napping..... and has a mysteriously runny nose with no other cold symptoms......
3. ambrose found an old baby bottle and chewed the rubbery top part like a puppy with a new shiny chew toy
4. ambrose cries more easily and something really seems to be bothering him.....
5. i have tried EVERYTHING and nothing seems to be right.... what IS WRONG???

hmmmm.....

is it obvious to anyone else yet?

6. ambrose screeched in my ear which seemed to distract him from complaining but then had to promptly bite me... what's going on with ... his ... mouth??!!

HIS MOUTH!!!!

we felt back there and sure enough, the beginnings of some two year old molars can be felt. give that boy some motrin or something.

case closed.

i really like: him, but he is a PEST! :)

i'm not joking.

godzilla returns. (is this referring to ambrose or his mom when she doesnt get her break during nap time? you be the judge.)

today he has refused to take a nap. i could just end there and mothers all over the world would bow their heads in a moment of silence for me since we feel so entitled to that sacred time of day.

instead of napping he has turned the tv on and off, wiped his runny nose all over every last inch of my once clean clothing, knocked over all of his play chairs and his toys and snacks are ALL OVER THE HOUSE,

and:

five minutes ago he ran over to me and wanted to be scooped up so i hugged him and i was just about to tell him i still loved him.... even if he was being a rascal and not napping as he cupped his mouth over my entire ear and SCREAMED... no, SCREECHED as loud as he possibly could into my ear and then laughed really hard about it.... my ear is still itchy and ringing, after that i told him to give me some space and he hugged me so i felt bad... but then he promptly bit my shoulder as hard as he could and laughed again........

i'm going to have two of these wild pups in just less than five months???? heaven help us all. :)

luckily daddy took over and they are merrily playing in the front room with primary tunes blasting and a serious game of hide and seek going on.

thank heavens for that. me, my snotty clothes, ear, shoulder and sanity need a little break.

i really like: BIG active chubby baby BOYS

and it's a good thing too since that's what we are having again. there is no doubt about it. the first thing we saw on the screen was a little boy part and the doctor said, "yep, no doubt about it-- he is very much a boy!" :)

also, he measures big (just like his BIG brother) and he is VERY very active (just like his big brother was and is).... i feel exhausted and excited just thinking about my future with these two pups.

and as i drove away from the appointment by myself (thomas reluctantly had to head out for work in the other car) i sobbed and sobbed... i could barely see the road... i feel so grateful and overwhelmed to be trusted with these two special boys. i promise to do all i can to help them become the individuals they were intended to be.

i really like: a lot of things, but these come to mind right now

our song

Susie Ghahremani's art found here

my babys cheeks

a juicy, cold pink grapefruit (especially when i'm pregnant)

radiohead

polka dots - always have always will...

talking to my sisters on the phone

lots and lots of little planners and notebooks

red lipstick and short red nails (not long nails- real or fake... just cuz im a germ-a-phobe! these ones are even a little long for my taste... but you get the idea.)

these colors and these dishes for that matter

snail mail

my forever

the colors and the general look of old maps- i am starting a collection of them so i can wallpaper a wall in my kids room with these beautiful images one day

optimism

organization in general

movies that i could watch over and over (and often do)








houndstooth fabric... if i have a girl next (and i find out thursday) i will make her a simple dress out of black and white houndstooth, mark my words :)

mates of state

thai food (curry curry curry)

a good book- classic or contemporary

a night out or in with my man