the love affair continues

seen: ambrose roaming the house at any given point of the day, conducting his usual business of charlie and lola watching, bike riding, and block building--but with a large starfruit in various forms of consumption clutched in his chubby fists- juice running down his arms onto whatever surface he is treading.


heard: "twinkle twinkle little star...fruit!!!" over and over and over.

what will he eat and sing about when the season is over???? :)

happy heartaches

seven o'clock rolls around and i cant seem to get ambrose to bed fast enough. i'm tired, worn down, and ready to unwind without a two year old dictating my actions for a few hours. and then a little time passes, inevitably i am on the computer for one reason or another, and usually i end up here:


clicking through images of my boys and longing to hold them and pinch their soft mochi cheeks and soak up their curious, needy, precious selves.


i miss them. me and thomas dont check on ambrose as much as we used to once he's in bed. he's a big boy now and we have a baby monitor to keep track of all the unusual sounds anyway, but we love to review all the cute things ambrose said to each of us all day and laugh about how smart and precious he is. then we marvel over asher and how sweet and easy he is.

thomas is off playing the drums in town again and so i am talking to myself tonight: laughing about how ambrose told me very seriously about all the things we did today and included unexpected details, how out of his monstrous storybook collection he has singled out the kids book of mormon and become fascinated with all the stories and keeping track of characters and details, how he cleverly changes lyrics in songs to hilariously fit the situation just like his daddy does, and how he still loves to eat at least seven pieces of fruit a day minimum.

asher has had me worried today with fevers and gnawing and has been uncharacteristically sad so i am thinking he is working on his first tooth. boo. a) he's not allowed to grow up and b) i hate to see him uncomfortable. he's such a pleasant peach. it just seems too cruel.

anyway, i'm loving my little boys. and i better go get some sleep since my partner in crime will be understandably tired tomorrow morning after his late night show- so it will be up to me to rise and shine with the sweeties- but i wanted to say goodnight, happy birthday dad, and i love you all..... i'm off to snuggle with asher. :)

every two year old boy's dream

having all these loud noises and big pieces of machinery around is a dream come true for ambrose. he watched them all morning and our awesome contractor, jim, called out to me as i was holding ambrose on the porch to have ambrose come up and give it a try. (look closely- there's a little boy with a chewbacca shirt on controlling that frightful piece of machinery!)

he took the task at hand very seriously. :)

and was up there for quite a while moving the controls around with "uncle jim!" a huge slab of concrete was removed by the time he got down and ambrose talked about his time on the "big yeddow truuuuck" for the rest of the day.

another perspective

i love seeing pictures other friends or family have taken of me, thomas, and the boys! it is so fun to see something so familiar through someone else's perspective. here are some pictures my friend matti recently emailed me from our fun camping trip last weekend!















and if you can handle more- i stole these delights off echo's blog:






i want to go back right now. kids need to be in nature. we all had such a good time!

friends of laie, kahuku, hauula, kaaawa...etc!

theys-a-tearin' up the house! like as i type this! and it is exciting and very very loud! no really, like it's caveman style. a burly man with what appears to be a huge crowbar is knocking the carport roof planks off one by one. ah! :)

anyway, if you live around here expect me to be inviting myself over all the time. oh my, there goes the chainsaw! haha

maybe my kids will get used to napping in the van........

this is crazy. i cant believe it is finally happening. i jumped for joy yesterday and skipped around the yard. i may just go do that again. see ya. (no really, i might be seeing ya. especially if i invite myself over. hehe)

this post meanders, but i wanted to share it anyway

when i'm tired i am a little more emotional and you can ask anyone in my family: i'm the cry baby. natalie too, but mostly me. she's like endearing and i'm just... emotional. :)

we were feeling good. the house plans are so exciting and nice and modern and we get to have a lot of say and everything is shaping out exactly like all my dreams over the last six months (or more). we were basking in the good feeling and then ambrose was begging to go to the temple. he likes the visitors center.

it was too early to start dinner, it was hot and muggy, and it was just me and the kids home so we walked up the street and entering the temple grounds was like taking a cool bath, but for your spirit, your nerves, and your soul. i felt my eyes start to sting a little. i told myself i was just tired.

we went into the crisply air conditioned visitors center and were immediately greeted by a sister missionary from japan who happily opened the door for our double wide stroller and kept asher company while ambrose and i went to look at "big Jesus"

ambrose was so excited! his big blue eyes lit up as if he was truly meeting him. a senior missionary asked if we wanted to turn the audio message on which is just about three minutes of sound from things Christ has said in the scriptures, but with my two year old standing in awe at the feet of Christ and the sound filling up the whole room- it felt like he was there for a minute. i just couldnt look away from ambrose's big eyes and innocent, delighted grin. i felt as if i knew what it would be like when he comes again and that he'll know me and ambrose and asher and we will know him.

i wasnt just tired. the spirit was so strong and tears poured down my cheeks as the audio said "behold the marks in my hands and feet" and ambrose eagerly reached out to touch them. even now as i type this i can't seem to hold back my tears.

at what point do we lose this innocence and bright-eyed faith and how can i help my son hold on to his?

i just hugged him close and we kind of floated around the visitors center for about thirty more minutes, watching videos and learning about Joseph Smith and looking at this picture of Christ in the temple as a young boy. i felt like i had a lot to teach my young boys and ambrose was asking so many sweet questions.

i was amazed at how he soaked up everything i was saying to him more than he ever has before and i felt, maybe for the first time, the full weight of what it means to be someone's mother and how much i have to teach him and how much the things i do and say will shape who he is whether i am aware of it or not. i cant get carried away with what i want to do anymore or i will have failed him.

anyway, i dont mean to go on and on, but i think it's important to jot down these kinds of things or i might get complacent and forget what we felt. a two year old is an amazing gift. i dont even want to think about what i would be doing with my selfish self if i didnt have him and asher. they help me grow and make me who i am supposed to be.

a-campin we did go

hoomaluhia botanical gardens are GORGEOUS! remember this post where i invited people to come be crazy with us and camp? well, the allreds, millers, and parkers must have been feeling crazy cuz they said they wanted to and i think we all wondered how things would go- and maybe even expected the worst- but things went great!

the kids had so much fun and just ran in circles the whole time. it was really fun for all of us to watch them play and get along so well. it was a really good group/mix/number of people at our perfect site. we ate a lot of junk, which is mandatory when you are camping for some reason.

when we asked ambrose about the whole experience after we were home, showered, and mostly unpacked today he said this: (and in a very serious, and contemplative tone mind you)

"friends, um marsh-yeddows (marshmallows), DUCKS! (i dont have pictures of that so i will steal them when my friends post theirs), camping, sleep mommy daddy asher TENT!!, cook da marsh-yeddows and a stick, PLAY!!!'

that about sums it up really. our small tent was a good size for our snuggly little family and i slept like a log (i think i was just tired, but really it wasnt bad). asher slept really great too. i think he liked the cooler weather- he didnt wake up drenched in sweat once! we had such a great time that we want to do it again and again and again. cant wait.