03 September 2010

were you hoping to feel like a moron today?

If so I've got a sure-fire way to fulfill your dreams:

Transfer all your stuff from your backpack to your purse EXCEPT for your wallet (that part is crucial) and then drive two little boys at least an hour away from your home to your nearest Target.

Take a picture of them looking cute in their double cart by the bikinis, but don't stop there!


Proceed to shop for a long time, taking full advantage of the fact that you don't get out to a Target very often because it is so far away from home and get every hard-to-find item on that list you have been keeping for weeks now.

Don't miss a single item, because you came here specifically for some of them and you really need them.

That's when that good old, uncomfortable realization will happen as you frantically dig through your purse... you know the one I'm talking about.

I guarantee success with this sure-to-make-you-feel-like-a-complete-moron plan.

It should be noted: If your husband works anywhere near (or actually kinda far...sorry Thomas) from this Target location he will be just a phone call away with his wallet perfectly intact because he isn't nearly as careless as you. He will have every right to make you feel even more like a moron...which will be helpful if that's what you're going for. If he is Thomas Robertson though, he won't make you feel that way. Which is what I was going for. (Did I mention I think you are neat and nice Thomas?)

Good luck with that. Let me know how it goes.

12 comments:

lizzie said...

I hate that for you. And also, I hate that I do that kind of thing all the time. I used to be a thoughtful, careful person before I became a mom, and now I feel like a ditz half the time.

But I love that Thomas was there to bail you out. Reminds me of someone I know . . . and happen to be married to. :)

liko said...

oh, man!!
i was thinking,'if i was with yo, thomas wouldn't have had to make his way out there...'
glad he came through as usual!!

Me said...

Oh man, I had a panic attack just this week after I drove to Target and got worried that I had forgotten my wallet. Luckily, I had it. I would have been so mad. My husband is off island, so I would have had no one to bail me out.

sheila said...

oh, you had me cringing through the story and then Thomas made it all better. Good thing for him. I was thinking,'oh no, she went home without any purchase from Target'. That would have been terrible.

I LOVE TARGET!

Patria said...

next time you're in a pickle like that call me! (i know there likely won't be a next time) i'm in town so it's no big deal for me to swing by and purchase for you. rural community members have to help each other out like that! (:

ashley said...

i almost did that same thing today at costco. lovely.

glad t rob saved your a ;)

echo said...

i passed you on the road on the way back from what i was assuming was your trip to target.
i am glad thomas is so kind.

Rachel said...

this is something I would do. Is it true that Hawaii Target has surfboards and that instead of plain red shirts the team members wear red aloha shirts?

diana palmer said...

i am sooo glad the ending wasn't as painful. welcome to crazyville. sorry, i'm already the mayor.

Mariko said...

I have totally done that.
Did you know that the bank will just LET you have your OWN money without an ID? Weird.

TanuvasaCasa said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Oh I SO just did this last week!!! We drove out to the children's place outlet, about 40 minutes away to take the kids school shopping. We took forever there getting all the right outfits, plus plenty extra from the $1.99 rack. Then Sa went to the food court to get the kids food while I stood in an insane line to pay. I got to the front and NO wallet. but what did i find..umm, sa's phone in MY purse. No calling for relief. Luckily, I had brought my check book to church the day before and I found ONE blank check!!!!!!! PHEW!!!

On your worst craziest days...I'm here for ya. I've SO been there!!!

Melissa said...

I do the most ridiculous things since i became a mother and said adios to my sanity. Oh well, good thing Thomas was there to the rescue! What a guy! :)