Every six months I research my dream graduate programs and hang on every single course description and all the possibilities...
It even feels really good when I consider packing my family up for a few years to go to Provo, NYC, wherever! to get my degree... we always feel like we could return....
I can always see myself, clearly, in a classroom full of like-minded English nerds talking about novels and poetry and theory and grammar and I get really excited and the mere fact that that excites me lets me know it's right...
Thomas is support and love personified, but he's my anchor and my reality check and I need that.
Where would we go and how and what kind of time commitment will it be and what I am willing to give up?
I always come to the conclusion that now is not the time.
It bums me out for about 2.5 seconds and then I realize that there is good, better, and best and I have the absolute best all day, all night, all around me.
And nothing is more important, exciting, or feels better than that!
Can you imagine compromising one single sweet moment with these guys? There's a season for everything and this time is precious. The end. :)
*Pictures stolen from Thomas's phone*
7 comments:
Oh how I hear you.
As much as I want to, now's not the time. And thank goodness we have such supportive husbands that let us figure that out for ourselves...
Love you, friend.
I don't know? We've got some really great friends studying English here in our hippie town and they really love it. Finding a job is another thing. The outside member on my diss committee did his grad work in English at Columbia and he's pretty darn happy here. It might be worth the compromise and I know a girl who would love to have you in the same town. Just kidding.
This is a good post. As an unintended consequence (Dewey called it "collateral learning"), it reminded me how lucky I am that my wife supports me in a career where I can sit around in rooms talking to like-minded nerds who like theory.
you have a beautiful family, steph.
(my verification is "mated"!!)
so happy that you are happy here where you are. ;-) I wish I could get all English and nerdy with you to help fill in the gap. But, alas...I took the SPED english course in HS, where our teachers read our stories to us. it was an easy A.
Don't sell yourself short. There are many people having the best of both worlds! I am glad you have your like-minded English nerds as an outlet and inspiration. Don't talk yourself out of something that is your dream -- the more you keep justifying your choices, the more it sounds like there is something else you want to do. Maybe when the kids are a little bigger, all of you could go somewhere together (I see you in NYC!) and receive great educations, if even for only a couple years until you head back to your island paradise. I admire your desire to learn and calling to teach!
Does your department and your peers accept online degrees? Your pictures are so great. It is good to want to be your best. Love you.
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