18 May 2011

Hey Everyone!

I have one million things I need to be doing right at this very moment, but I couldn't let you think I was still off in loser-ville!

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SYMPATHIES OR TIPS OR ADVICE!

I took it all very seriously and synthesized it together and have already seen improvement. So quick! I am a little in shock because I honestly just thought of my kids as little robots who were incapable of anything else and that is not true for any kids! So parents who have kids in the same predicament: don't give up!

I think more than one of my friends was very smart to point out that every kid is different so there is no one size fits all fix and you must know what works for your kid and keep trying til you get where you want to be. It's a process, however slow, and we are starting on the right path.... I'm so excited!

So here's what is working for us already:

This may seem painfully obvious to everyone, but don't let your kids fill up on snacks all day long or they will not be hungry at meal times.

DUH!

It seems like a no-brainer, but I am the type that just grazes all day so of course my kids are. And we don't always snack on healthy stuff and as I was reading through your comments it was slowly dawning on me that this may be our main problem!

In fact, while I was typing this Ambrose yelled, "Mama! I'm going to save my breakfast for later! I'm full!" and then came in two minutes later to where I was on the computer and said, "I'm gonna get a granola bar."

And I was doing something, obviously, so I was tempted to be like, "Yeah, sure, whatever..." and then I realized, "NOOOOOO!!!!"

"Nope buddy, sorry, if you are hungry you can finish your breakfast. If you are not hungry you can just go back to playing. We will have snack time later on today."

DUH!

He left the room crying and even tried to sneak a snack two seconds later, but I held firm and he got over it.

Ok, but here's the miracle that happened yesterday! You'll think I am making this up, but it's true. We had to go to the mall so they had mall food for lunch (by the way Ambrose got a book at the mall as a prize for trying five new foods... another tip I followed from you guys...smaller goals) and then we came home and got ready for swim lessons and after swim lessons they were hungry so I knew I needed a fast dinner, but I needed at least 30 minutes for the chicken to cook.

CHICKEN!


There's no way they'll eat chicken that's not in nugget form, I thought. But I wanted to try out your tips so I went for it. I said, "Let's get out and play a little in the yard or at Grandmas so the chicken can bake." They begged and begged for a whole convenience store of snacks....hanging out by the pantry door like crack addicts at a crack house. I wouldn't budge. NO SNACKING BEFORE DINNER.

After a bit, I said, "Fine, dinner is almost done, but if you just can't make it here is some water and look trees!" (Raw broccoli... there's no way in the fiery pits of hell they will go for this....I thought.)

Ambrose ate a whole head (or whatever you call it) of raw broccoli.

One "tree" after another. Asher remained firmly planted to the pantry door, whining pathetically. He was so determined but meandered off after a while to whine by the window- perhaps hoping a worker from CPS would be walking by who he could call out to. I noticed he was not in the vicinity so I seized the moment to get the rice out of the pantry and I have never seen even a cockroach in pursuit escape across a room so quickly. Asher was in that pantry before you could say, "high fructose corn syrup."

I had to herd him back out kicking and screaming and believe me, although this was all somewhat amusing, this was no fun for me... but all this felt strangely familiar. It felt like when I had to eventually make my kids cry themselves to sleep at night with child knobs on their door. It sounds bad, it feels wrong, but it is completely and totally RIGHT to give your kids necessary boundaries or you are IN TROUBLE later in life. Kids are happier once they can finally sleep through the night by themselves and you are happier. This is the same situation.

Hallelujah! Dinner was finally done (and don't worry this post almost is as well) so I put a little bit of chicken (cheesy chicken to be exact... a suggestion from my sister Britt!) on each boy's plate with a little bit of rice. I didn't even mess with our usual fruit side dish, because I know these kids, and they would just fill up on it and ignore the rest. I then went to dish up my plate and by time I had sat down and said, "Want to say the prayer Ambrose?" ASHER WAS HALF WAY DONE WITH HIS DINNER!

ASHER!

ASHER WHO EATS LIKE THREE THINGS AND MAINLY JUST DRINKS MILK FOR SURVIVAL!

I was shocked. I didn't even stop him while Ambrose said the prayer. He ate it all and asked for more.

OHHHHHH he was actually hungry for dinner instead of being full from a day of drinking sippy cup after cup of milk and snacking on cereal, crackers, and fruit. WOW.

Ambrose cautiously ate a few bites of chicken with lots of prompting from me and a bite of rice and that is huge for him as well.

In conclusion, my world has been rocked.

10 comments:

melissa said...

verrrrry good. i was a little worried to be honest. i thought "oh no maybe there's nothing she can do!" but silly me, of course there is.

so what is this business about sleeping through the night? we don't get it around here. maybe you can direct all of your advice-giving friends to me on this one.

We like to party... said...

That's awesome news! I too, tend to snack and give Kailani snacks... leading to the same problem.
But you have given a new light on the subject.
-sheila

snbjork said...

Yay! You have totally inspired me to try a few new things around here, too. Who knows, maybe we'll have a success story to share soon? The less snacking thing would be really good for ME as I need to lose lots and lots of weight. I'm a terrible example to my kids right now...all the emotional eating (after having a baby a few months ago).

And to your friend, Melissa, let me say: BABYWISE. Get the book, read it, then use the principles. Your kids will sleep through the night. My 11 week old started sleeping 7-9 hours at night this last week. It's heavenly.

modestmuse said...

OK seriously, I laughed so many times reading this! CPS, crack addicts, roaches and high-fructose corn syrup, you are hilarious!!! And besides that, you are an awesome mom, good work and congrats. Now I'm hungry, I wish I had some cheesy chicken and rice up in here.

Brady and Rachel said...

HOORAY! I didn't post before because I couldn't think of any advice to give because every kid is so different, but I did read it and thought about you the other day. So glad there is improvement. Totally understand on those aha! moments that make you feel like "duh"! Definitely had my fair share of those. My boys do okay with eating, don't love it at times, but they still have to eat it. However, Baylee is a WHOLE NEW WORLD! Reminds me of what you said about Asher only eating maybe three tiny bites, etc We are lucky to get Baylee to eat 2 bites of something for dinner. And really it was this way for all 3 meals for a while, but she has improved on breakfast and lunch a little more. But dinner she can literally not eat anything from lunch to dinner, refuse to eat dinner and sleep just fine through the night. She was never a baby that cried because she was hungry, which was different from the boys. She's had months here and there that have been an improvement, and then fallen back again. But she is still growing and is healthy so she must be getting something good in there at times at least. Its just funny because maybe once a week she will eat her dinner well (maybe, sometimes every week and a half) and we'll joke that she's stocking up for the week. :) Hang in there and keep progressing, ever so slowly or quickly. Good luck and don't get down on yourself, or at least get right back up when you do. I'll try to do the same.

Thomas said...

At first I didn't understand why you matched up this song with this post. Then I remembered that the bass player is named Chicken.
http://www.slugmag.com/articles/836/Dead-to-Me.html

Nate and Julie said...

Great story! great advice! I too am a grazer and so is my daughter. It's so much easier to just pump her full of snacks so I can cook dinner, but then she won't eat said dinner. Thanks for the inspiration. Love you! Miss you!

Kahilau said...

Ok, you are so stinkin' funny. Seriously I laughed and laughed and called Mike over and we laughed more. Thank you for that! We had one of those kinds of days today too. On a more serious note, isn't it amazing how Heavenly Father just waits for us to get clear about teaching our kids something, it can be anything really. Once we are clear and determined to make things work He sends the right people and the right blessings and everything works like "MAGIC". So happy that things are better for you! Keep it up, it's not easy but oh so worth it!

TLC said...

Stephanie! I'm so glad you enjoy my blog; I love yours too! And .... you totally put me in the mood for broccoli; I had some cooked with dinner last night and leftover raw with lunch today. :)

.Ang. said...

haha this is awesome!

It's amazing how fast they can change when we are persistent!

I remember being a really picky eater when I was little. I only liked a couple kinds of veggies RAW and any kind of meat. I remember many nights being stranded at the table until I finished my plate or at least my veggies from my plate. I grew up to expand my palate so there is hope out there!

My kids used to eat everything, but Tyke is starting to get picky! He IS a snacker though... perhaps I need to follow your lead and close the kitchen to him for everything except designated snack and mealtimes!

Good thinking!!!

GOOD THINKING STEPHANIE!! -Thanks!