at any stage of life really. I think as a mom the insecurities can pile high and smother you if you let them because everything you do could potentially change someone eles's life drastically. And not just any "someone," but little impressionable someones that Heavenly Father trusted you with.
I worry about their emotional self-esteem and how the way I treat them now will affect them when they are older.
I worry about the way I approach potty training somehow messing them up in the future.
I worry about the way I treat food and how it will dictate the way they eat as adults or what kind of body they will have.
I worry about giving them too much attention and spoiling them, or not enough attention and making them insecure and needy....
Should Ambrose start preschool and when and on what schedule?
Asher can finally walk, but why isn't he trying to say much?
How will my leaving three times a week to teach make them feel?
Will I ever be able to handle another child?
Will I feel sad if I never have another child?
How do I teach Ambrose and Asher about the gospel when I am still learning myself and what's important for them to learn now?
Why can't I muster up all the patience that I need a lot of the time and how is that going to reveal itself in Ambrose and Asher when they need to show patience someday?
DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?
This is exactly why it is great to have a favorite scripture:
"Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest." (Joshua 1:9)
I always try to corner my dad into telling me some sort of fix-all parenting secret since he is a psychologist who specialized in child development. Sometimes he tells me things I don't want to hear because being a parent is hard work and I want all the answers now. Mostly he just tells me the truth and I need that.
Recently he said, "You can read up on what to do, you can ask the advice of others who have children too, but then you just need to trust yourself and follow your instinct above all. You're doing a great job."
I think that's true. I'm doing a great job.
Haha. No, actually what I mean is he is right about the rest. I get so caught up in what some website or magazine or parenting book says should be happening that I forget the best advice comes from the still small voice. It certainly doesn't hurt to read up and know all the options, but I just need to quiet down and listen to that above all.
I am so happy to have that knowledge.
Faith is better than fear. Here's to happiness! (and husbands who love to document the everyday moments that we cherish)