06 February 2009

pregnant teen alert

usually i get these fuzzy (in a good way) little moments where i know that even though i am young- i am doing exactly what i am supposed to be doing in life right now and i feel really really lucky.

other times, i am bent over with my underwear showing out the back of my pants, trying to scrape a tantruming toddler off the library story-time floor and simultaneously bribing him with candy/juice/his toy dog/anything short of his own Nintendo DS if he promises to get up... my hair is falling out of it's messy ponytail, my broken out skin (thank you pregnancy hormones) is flushing red since i know everyone can hear me and him, and i'm doing all of this in a stance that can best be described as "granny bowling" since i have a five-month bun cooking in my oven that makes it hard for me to bend over these days.

someone will walk by and take note of him and me and the impending baby bump and mutter something helpful like, "looks like you've got your hands full..." with a tone of equal parts pity, humor, and a little disdain for the young girl who is apparently very fertile or something...

this is when i feel like a pregnant teenager. a little in over my head and seemingly unequipped to "deal" with it all.

but then there are all the other moments when something whispers to me that i am doing all this for a reason and it's probably no coincidence that i just happen to be young while doing it, that my son is healthy and happy and loves his mama, that my family (both sides)and husband are proud of me and always so helpful (i'm not alone in other words), and there are many other girls just like me.

yup girls, we are all just young girls trying our best. trading something that seems more exciting and glamorous for something a little more lasting and not always as easy.

so, when we head to the park for a lovely lunch and mother/son play excursion and i look down to see that his clothes are mysteriously soaked and lo and behold i havent packed a spare outfit for him since he was nine months old and he's squealing to get out of his soggy attire and saggy diaper - i can relax, maneuver my melon-esque torso to a suitable position conducive to getting down in the grass and putting him in a clean diaper, leave him in nothing but that and his clompy shoes and continue on to more time playing in the fleeting good weather... soaking it up.... ambrose, his bun of a brother, and his pregnant teen mom. :)

15 comments:

Jessica F. said...

You have the most fantastic outlook on life!
My wedding ring didn't fit for most of my pregnancy and people were so nice to me...I always felt like thy thought I was a single mom or something!

Meg said...

what a lovely post--so well written and so perfect in sentiment. nothing is more noble, more important than motherhood.

Liz T.D. said...

I feel like even if I wait til I'm 35 to have a child, I'll still feel like a teenage mom :)

mrs. peterson said...

it is really a sweet thing to be able to do this all right now. i'm sorry to say that it drives me crazy that i'll be 25 before i have any kids. but i'm also grateful for the awesome things i've been able to do in the meantime.

snbjork said...

Stephanie. Seriously. I can't tell you how much I love reading your thoughts. Nine out of ten times you describe my feelings about things so perfectly. You know just how to put everything into the right words. Thank you for being to bold and open because it helps me to realize that I am not alone in anything I do, think, or feel. I remember feeling exactly this way during both pregnancies. Sometimes I still feel that way when I take my kids out in public (I don't bring them out often...). =)

You are lovely! Do you wanna come over and play today? I could use some girl talk. Not to mention that I've never seen your pregnant belly in person!

Libby said...

since im probably never going to have kids, im just going to experience that part of life through you, okay?! with your permission of course:)

love this post. love you. our family is beautiful, and ambrose is rockin some pretty cool kid shoes these days.

ashley said...

totally know how you feel. i love it when people ask if i am their nanny. but i would not trade being a young mother for the world, and i really don't want to make use of my teaching degree at any time soon, so i will continue to have more children!
and love amby's shoes and ivy just said ambrose and it was really really cute!

sheila said...

very well said. I usually always feel like a teenager raising a child. Crazy how things happen and somehow it all works out, even when you don't know how to do them.

Lindsey said...

I echo everyone else's comments in saying that I LOVE reading your blog. It makes me happy to know that I am not the only one living a different kind of glamorous life. But, just like you, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

J&D said...

True True! I always got the craziest looks while pregnant...I always felt like a knocked up teenager! Very well said...trade in something glamorous for a something that lasts longer... I like

In.A.Nutshell said...

amen and amen.

darcie said...

if there's anywhere you can get away with all of the public mommy stuff you've just described it's north shore. i mean at least ambrose has shoes on! also, tell thomas that kjell is vying for the best hawaiian drummer someday and to watch his back.

Emily said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! You bring a smile to my face! And at least Ambrose has cool shoes.

boo face mcjones said...

man, i have to admit that i find myself in the same but opposite position. i can't tell you the number of times i have felt disdain headed my way by being the age i am, married for as long as i have been, and lacking offspring. it's really heartbreaking sometimes. particularly because i would love nothing more than some buns in my oven.

but like you, i have those moments where i know heavenly father has blessed me with the path i need. so i keep going with faith, trying to enjoy the journey.

isn't it divinely inspired that we can all learn the same lessons through different experiences? you can't convince me there isn't a plan.

thanks for the reminder; i needed it today.

diana palmer said...

when i read this post i felt sooo relieved that you're my friend. i had the strange thought that what if i only knew you from a distance and was stalking this blog as i do others, and you were writing such lovely, inspiring things? i would feel so sad that we weren't real friends. so thank goodness, and you are one of a kind.

also, i'm glad you feel more like a young pregnant teen than forty years old (no offense to any forty year old readers). but lately the word that comes to mind when i look in the mirror is "old."