do something nice for yourself

I have been hard on my body lately. Eating stuff I shouldn't and telling myself I'll just run a billion miles to work it off, BUT I'm pretty sure that's not how good health works OR how we are supposed to treat the amazing gift that is our bodies and it can't be good for you in the long run. (unintentional pun. wha-whahhhhh)

Plus I have old lady feet and have been feeling the pins in my feet from surgeries in years past, so I am taking a running hiatus and swimming laps in the morning and I LOVE IT! Swimming is so gentle on the body while still being a huge workout. I already feel more toned. I don't know about looking more toned. But I feel good and I come home all energized to start my bright-and-early day with the family.

Swimming laps is the nicest thing I have done for myself in a while and we all deserve something nice don't we?

Another nice thing I've been treating myself to is a delicious green smoothie every morning. My dad was intrigued so I told him I'd post the recipe.

My cousin's cute wife posted this recipe on her blog a while ago and we started out doing the orange juice variation which was good, but one day I didn't have orange juice and so I tried the milk variation and have never looked back. It's like a tasty milkshake.

Here's my version:

1 cup milk
3 HUGE handfuls of spinach (fill up that blender!)

Blend until smooth.

Then add:
2 TBSP flaxseed (buy from costco. easy huh.)
2 heaping scoops of vanilla protein powder (Also from costco. You have no excuse. Get the purple and silver bag. Not the white container. TRUST ME.)
a frozen banana cut up (I buy 2 bunches at a time, peel them, throw them in a bag all together, and freeze them like that.)

Blend all that up together til it's nice and milkshake-y.

And that's it. And Thomas and I drink it, and the boys gulp some down too. Every morning and BAM you started your day with a HUGE green salad with calcium, protein, omega fatty acids, and a serving of fruit. You can add fresh or frozen berries...etc. if you want, but we keep it simple and it's totally delicious.

ENJOY!

we can do this

(photo courtesy of thomas robertson)

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life." 2 Nephi 31:20

i had to share

I have been feeling so good lately.

In our home.
Kids healthy at last.
Work is so fun.
Home all day with the kids living it up- beaching a lot too!
Good friends and family to call my own.
Thomas starting exciting new ventures in his career that he SO DESERVES.

It feels like the light at the end of the tunnel is radiating brilliantly all around us!

I think it is really important to stand still. Take a deep breath. And recognize how good we have it every once in a while.

It is so easy for me to complain or worry. But luckily I tend to hope no matter what and I know that is because I have faith in my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ.

I know that they know me personally and they care about me. I know it. I feel my eyes brimming with tears and a whispered confirmation as I type that.

I love this Christian song (JJ Heller Your Hands) I stumbled upon a while back when I was really struggling. It was a perfect expression of my testimony at the time. So beautiful.

Anyway, tonight I was preparing my lesson for the zany 11 year olds Thomas and I teach and these quotes made my soul smile and my heart beat with joy. I just had to share!

by Virginia H. Pearce:

“• Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ live, and they are in charge of this world.

“• They know me.

“• They love me.

“• They have a plan for my future.

“• I will obey the commandments, work hard, and trust in their plan. Sooner or later, everything will be okay” (“Faith Is the Answer,” Ensign, May 1994, p. 92).


from President Gordon B. Hinckley:

“Every one of you was endowed by your Father in Heaven with a tremendous capacity to do good in the world. Train your minds and your hands that you may be equipped to serve well in the society of which you are a part. Cultivate the art of being kind, of being thoughtful, of being helpful. Refine within you the quality of mercy which comes as a part of the divine attributes you have inherited” (“The Light within You,” Ensign, May 1995, p. 99).

(photo credit the one and only natalie norton!)

Sooner or later everything has become more than OK for us and I know we have a long way to go, but I am enjoying where we are and what we have to look forward to and feeling grateful for what we have done. The support of family is wonderful too. We love our parents and siblings! We love our extended families and good friends! We love the Lord. Life is progressing. Hope all is well with you and if it is not- hold on with a perfect brightness of hope!

The Lord knows you. He loves you so much too. Great things ahead if we all do our part! How exciting.

don't get your panties in a bunch

This is NOT an announcement by any means, but the other day Ambrose did tell daddy that we needed a "girl baby" and I couldn't disagree. Thomas felt ganged up on. :)

But really, when I see things like this:
here

it makes me feel a secret little longing that I really didn't think I was going to feel again because I am content with my little family. We are having a great time with our sweet, feisty boys.

But, ahhh, there's so many fun sewing projects for little girly girls.

Anyway, I seem to be a little random in my thoughts these days, but what I am thinking about tonight is how much I am enjoying motherhood and how lucky I am to be home with my children.

I could get a full-time job and we would probably be a lot better off, but I choose to sacrifice all the "lot better off" stuff and stay home. Not everyone can or wants to make that choice and that's everyone's own business. You know what's best for your family and I know what's best for mine and this is my blog so I'm talkin about me here. ;)

When I think about all the molding and shaping that is going on with my children from the moment they wake up in the morning until the moment their chubby cheeks hit their pillows at night I get a little overwhelmed and feel inadequate, but we take it day by day and we try our best and when we get stressed out and aren't doing our best we can start over fresh.

I think every child deserves a nurturing, loving parent to be there for them and raise them well.

I feel like this time is so important not only for my kids, but for me too. I have learned to go without and learned to find fun and learning opportunities in so many different settings. I have also learned what my limits are and when to take a little breather or how to pick my battles...etc.

I'm so grateful for the chance to be with them - taking on the day with enthusiasm, hope, and love- in search of the next big adventure!

What is the future going to bring for our family?

I'm in no rush to have any answers these days, because even when things get whiney and crazy I am really enjoying the here and now.

This is a new feeling for me.

I am a girl who probably would have enjoyed many different careers, but who currently finds herself swimming in playdates, stickers, PB&J, potty training, forts, sand and sunscreen, marshmallows, number flashcards, car seats, story-time, tantrums, baby kisses, scripture stories, camp-outs, kites, library books, mum mum crackers...etc.

and it's a sweet place to be.

I know this is what I am supposed to be doing right now.

What could be better?

you wanna run too?

BYUH students, faculty, and staff can run this awesome 5k for Haiti that my friend Jonna is in charge of

aaaand in September there is the Hina Mauka 5k Dry Walk and Recovery Run in Kapiolani Park. I know September is a long time from now, but if you register now it is only $10 so even if you back-out you are only out $10.

It's a lot of fun. Me and Sheila are doing it since she will have had her babe by then and wants to run a race. Great way for all of us moms to get in shape. Join us! Sign up here before Feb.28th and you will only have to shell out $10. The proceeds go to a great cause too of course!

Also, both these runs are, of course, not on a Sunday. This is really rare in the running community. Seize the opportunity! :)

Totally worth it.

love is an ocean, i'm anchored in you.

It's up to me to choose how I want to be.

No.1: Had a great day with my babies all day. Pink eye or no. It was just the three of us home all day and it was nice to spread out and have dance parties and build tower after tower and spin around until we had to collapse in a pile of silly laughter- nowhere to be and no one to see- just us.

No.2: The boys eyes are like 98% cleared up already and I never got it. The doctor told me there was a couple different kinds of pink eye and if I haven't gotten it by now, well, things are looking good folks.

No.3: Tonight I ran and ran and ran.

No.4: This afternoon I got to talk to my bff. It was perfect.

No.5: You can be sad. For a month or more. That's just fine. There are reasons to be sad and there is a time and a place for everything, but as for right now I am looking forward to moving forward. I like being happy most and working at it is better than stagnant, blank dissatisfaction.

No.6: Tomorrow we get to support the Nortons and celebrate a sweet little life. I can't easily shake the sadness I feel for them, but maybe that's a good thing. I hug my kids a little more and enjoy the sticky, chaotic, and even sassy moments more fully these days.

No.7: There were a lot of things about my life that were getting me down because they were all out of my control. Let's just accept the things we cannot change ok. There are way worse things than waiting for an apartment to be done...etc.

No.8: My Melissa (or Mama-Lissa as Ambrose likes to call her) brought me cookies. Not only did they serve as an excellent bribe at eye drop time, but they were delicious! Honestly. How nice!

No.9: I get to be married to him. And if I went on, like I like to do, about all the awesome things he does for me and the boys everyday you might think I'm lying so I won't bother. Suffice to say, he keeps us all together with an even tone, a quick wit, and unconditional love. I'm trying to learn from him.

No.10: That's really all I got. Thanks for reading. I'm off to sleep so I can get up and teach elements of the essay in the morning. Aloha.

hypocrite mom

this morning i was trying to wake up before i got ready to go teach my class and so i checked my email and my dear friend melissa p. wrote me saying,

"first of all, did you read cjane today? go ahead and read it and then answer me this: do you feel like she read your blog or what? yikes.

xxoom"

and my first thought, was, "absolutely not. no way." because how many people know and love their family - obviously most of you who commented on this post of mine knew exactly who she was and even what post i was talking about before you could even find my link.

so, i went to my google reader, located her post: this is the one in case my link is not showing up yet again and sure enough the first little paragraph sounded in response to what i flippantly said.

but i still don't think she read my little blog and took so much offense that she decided to mention it in the openning of her post.

i hope not anyway.

and here is why: what do i tell my two year old at the playground every single day? be nice. it doesn't matter if he didn't mean it: be nice.

of course i also said in my post that she is always well written, that i read her everyday when i was appreciating the updates she gave us on her sister's life and children, that i like her and thought she was funny...etc. but what stands out? the self-important part. and that is not kind.

if you don't have something nice to say- don't say anything at all. right? :)

anyway, i am 100% sure that she didn't read what i said, but it still matters to be nice.

in 1998, one of my heroes Marjorie Hinckley said, "Let's be kind to one another and cheer each other on."

and i couldn't agree more. i've been trying to teach my son that so i am going to go and do the same thing. it matters what we say- even if we don't think the other person will read it and even if we say it flippantly. the end. :)

a quilting bee

just my mother-in-law and me......

don't look ashley jones! that blue one may or may not be for your soon-to-be baby boy! :)

this post meanders, but i wanted to share it anyway

when i'm tired i am a little more emotional and you can ask anyone in my family: i'm the cry baby. natalie too, but mostly me. she's like endearing and i'm just... emotional. :)

we were feeling good. the house plans are so exciting and nice and modern and we get to have a lot of say and everything is shaping out exactly like all my dreams over the last six months (or more). we were basking in the good feeling and then ambrose was begging to go to the temple. he likes the visitors center.

it was too early to start dinner, it was hot and muggy, and it was just me and the kids home so we walked up the street and entering the temple grounds was like taking a cool bath, but for your spirit, your nerves, and your soul. i felt my eyes start to sting a little. i told myself i was just tired.

we went into the crisply air conditioned visitors center and were immediately greeted by a sister missionary from japan who happily opened the door for our double wide stroller and kept asher company while ambrose and i went to look at "big Jesus"

ambrose was so excited! his big blue eyes lit up as if he was truly meeting him. a senior missionary asked if we wanted to turn the audio message on which is just about three minutes of sound from things Christ has said in the scriptures, but with my two year old standing in awe at the feet of Christ and the sound filling up the whole room- it felt like he was there for a minute. i just couldnt look away from ambrose's big eyes and innocent, delighted grin. i felt as if i knew what it would be like when he comes again and that he'll know me and ambrose and asher and we will know him.

i wasnt just tired. the spirit was so strong and tears poured down my cheeks as the audio said "behold the marks in my hands and feet" and ambrose eagerly reached out to touch them. even now as i type this i can't seem to hold back my tears.

at what point do we lose this innocence and bright-eyed faith and how can i help my son hold on to his?

i just hugged him close and we kind of floated around the visitors center for about thirty more minutes, watching videos and learning about Joseph Smith and looking at this picture of Christ in the temple as a young boy. i felt like i had a lot to teach my young boys and ambrose was asking so many sweet questions.

i was amazed at how he soaked up everything i was saying to him more than he ever has before and i felt, maybe for the first time, the full weight of what it means to be someone's mother and how much i have to teach him and how much the things i do and say will shape who he is whether i am aware of it or not. i cant get carried away with what i want to do anymore or i will have failed him.

anyway, i dont mean to go on and on, but i think it's important to jot down these kinds of things or i might get complacent and forget what we felt. a two year old is an amazing gift. i dont even want to think about what i would be doing with my selfish self if i didnt have him and asher. they help me grow and make me who i am supposed to be.

my old crafty self

a couple of weeks ago i was feeling a little sad about that fact that i didnt have energy to sew or be crafty anymore. and i thought, "that's funny. i cant make anything because i made another person. well, that's fine. i am happy with that for now." so, when i saw this a couple days later i nearly died laughing:

found here
so true! anyway, i decided not to do the advanced sewing class. it just wasnt gonna work out with my family's schedule that well and i like putting first things first and letting things happen if they are meant to happen.

last night, the kids were sleeping and so i decided to get over the sewing slump and i made this:

for a friend. it's the vintage apron project from bend the rules sewing.

and i finally got around to cookin' up some koolaid playdough that i heard about on my friend carrie's blog- it smells awesome and doesnt stain... just dont try eating it.

it may smell like candy, but as i warned the boys, it tastes like a big salt lick (echo... haha). the boys thought they were being so rebellious by chanting, "eat it! eat it!" and so i said, "go for it." and they learned their lesson pretty quick. ha!

and as for cookin'- i've made a bunch of stuff out of the tried and true recipe book over that last couple of months (aside from my normal dinners which involves making up a meal to use whatever produce we have). let's see if i can remember it all... well, here's a sampling:

lizzie's hummus
megan's thai pork noodles (we used chicken though)
echo (private blogger- sorry no link) and molly's german or puffy pancakes
suzanne's bbq chicken
star's ultimate pizza dough
ashley's peppery broccoli chicken pasta
taylor's homemade oreos
logan's orange julius
melissa's peanut butter chocolate chip cookies
star's peanut butter fudge
becca's brown sugar muffins

i think that's it... it's been a tasty couple of months!

hooray for creating and making. it makes life more fun.

one for his brother too....

well, i got bored this weekend because thomas had a late show and some other work to do so i whipped up a baby quilt top for the new child. it matches ambrose's but it is baby sized since boy number two wont be needing a bedspread for a couple of years.

now i am patiently waiting for my mother-in-law to return (june 1st) so she can show me how to put these two quilts together (she doesnt know this fact.... so linda if you are reading this: can you get me started with your quilting frames?)

i got some bright orange quilting cotton to back and bind these babies and it looks really cute. i am so excited to see the finished product and as always, i will put a photo up when i am done!

if you want to learn how to make your own little baby quilt (it is SO much easier than you think!) check out my happy little life- i am so glad she put this up. so helpful!

ok all done!

and dash it all... i'm really proud. i just feel like i am still trying to uncover this mystery that is sewing... so when things work out i cant help but grin from ear to ear. i showed some of my friends the bag this morning before i had put the bindings and handles on and now i am embarrassed that i did that because it really wasnt much to look at then but now it looks pretty good. anyway, without further ado... here she is!

or if i'm feeling a little crazy i can flip it inside out and have the lining show. and yes, that would be my first real pocket there. i even measured out the space to fit my iPhone perfectly:
and just so you can grasp the hugeness of this bag- here is what it looks like on... although perhaps this isnt an accurate representation of what it will look like when i have two kids because my watermellon stomach dwarfs everything right now.... but just know, this bag will be able to hold it all.


and here is ambrose modeling the bag... he wanted to wear it around until it came time to take photos.... maybe he knew i could blackmail him someday with purse pictures and he didnt want to appear too excited about the idea. ha! maybe he's just trying to be aloof and high fashion......

well, that's all for now. hooray for trying new things!

i made these last week

for two of amby's little friends. their birthdays were a while ago, but i finally did it. i didnt have access to a computer to look up a tutorial (remember when you sent me one like a year ago AJ?) so i looked at one my friend meg made for ambrose and guessed. i am happy with how they turned out. i think i could do better next time too. hooray for sewing.

i made a dress too, but i dont have a picture of that. i stopped going down to bernina to sew on saturdays because it was just too much time away during my weekend family time. i am happy that i figured out how to finish that dress. i seriously studied over each step in the pattern and stressed, but it was really fun too.

my friend lizzie started a blog for writers called oliofolio and asked me to be a regular contributor. this week makes it's second week going strong and i published my first piece on it a few seconds ago. each week we have a new theme and each day something fresh will be published from one of the contributing writers that has something to do with that week's theme. i will be contributing at least twice a month (hopefully more, i just have to get writing and be brave) and if you want to know the truth i am excited but a little nervous because so far the writing has all been so great that i feel like such an impostor. my insecurities aside, i am grateful for the chance to be a part anyway and honored that she even asked me. i think it will be good practice at the very least and it is so inspiring to read what everyone else writes and marvel at how good they are.

so this is my first piece on oliofolio: this is a test, or coming home to a place you've never been before. i was happy with it until i clicked "publish" and now i just see flaws, but here it is anyway. i hope to get better. head on over and let us know what you think of us all- we are eager to improve, create, share and grow.

making our last weeks last

we had quite the day starting with ambrose's two year old well-baby check-up and here are the stats (this is mostly for the grandmas but it's kind of you to humor me, thanks.):

32lbs. 37.5 inches tall 49.5 cm. head (way to go son) and healthy as a horse.
he has had another growth spurt height wise and has gone off the charts again leading the doctor to believe that he may be 6' 3" or 6' 4" or so when he is an adult. he was impressed that ambrose is so tall and grew so much since he mostly eats fruit, but the boy drinks a lot of milk too so i guess milk really does do a body good. :)

anyway, he had to have a blood test too and since he was such a good boy for the whole ordeal we headed out for a day of adventure. i think i ran out the energy-o-meter so much today, that by the end of the afternoon he was running on fumes and poor thomas got the worst of it when i headed out for a baby shower and he put the boy to bed.

we started out our afternoon at coldstone- cashing in his free birthday ice cream coupon (yeah, i removed his shirt in the store before he ate it... i really like that shirt and dont trust ambrose to eat anything neatly... least of all chocolate ice cream)

next we headed out to kaneohe district park- one of our favorites to play and get energy out:
he's been working on those dangerous stairs in that top photo for a while and can do them by himself with full confidence now (crap) and refuses to have me anywhere near him (bitting my nails nervously picturing him with missing teeth) to help him. ah, a toddler's independence.
after a while we were starting to head home when he started saying "play! PLAY!" and i said, "OK!" and we pulled over to explore heeia state park. it's cool. you can walk down this little path and look at all the boats in the harbor and then you quickly find yourself in front of a random house... i thought maybe jakob would summon me in and tell me all the secrets of the island but no such luck. no john or jack's dad or weird claire without her baby either (this is all LOST talk... sorry if you're, well, lost.. haha... i'm sooo funny.) so we continued on but the path looked a little too narrow and mysterious for a mother who is 30 weeks pregnant to be taking her two year old on alone... so i thought we could come back with daddy sometime.
really, ambrose's favorite part of the park was doing this over and over:
i got bored of that so we left. a few minutes down the road he was asking to play at the park again and i was like, "well, why not. we have nothing else to do and it's good for him." so we stopped at swanzy beach park in kaaawa.



and he did this again a couple of times as if to prove a point:
he really wanted me to play with him the whole day too. at one point i was just sitting down catching my breath and he impatiently came over to me and took off my slippers- just the way i take his off so he can climb up the slide more easily and placed them just so:
it was a pretty fun day. we just went wherever and had a good time being together. days like these make me so happy, but a little sad too. ambrose and i are such good friends and i know that in about two months everything will change for me, for him, and for "us." i am so excited to meet this second baby, but i feel a little like i am letting go of my first baby somewhat since it will never so easy to pack up on a whim and have an adventurous day like this until the boys are older. and i will never be able to give him this kind of undivided friendship once baby number two comes. i am going to cherish this time and keep it with me forever.

fun!

i'm getting so crafty lately. what's the deal.

i needed thank you cards for all the kind folks who showered amby with love on thursday so i made these cards out of my mother-in-law's stampin' up! scraps last night (thanks linda!)

and then today during ambrose's nap i made these oneies for my friend's baby shower this week- she's having twins! (thanks melissa peterson for telling me how!)

look mom!

the pregnant hippo:
made some party favors WITH hippos on them for all the kiddlets who come to amby's shin-dig.
i hope i made enough.
thanks for the over-the-phone tutorial. i wanna sew like you.